cowboys don't always mean a rodeo and dating..part two

ahhh yes..the dating service. I want to say up front, I met some very nice men and had sone very nice dates through the dating service. But all in all, it was just a weird ass experience. Unlike so many of my decisions, the one to join the "old people meet old people" dating service, was NOT well thought out. LOL-this is a joke cause i rarely think through....never mind. Actually, there was a picture of this older, good-looking man that was ALWAYS on the side of my facebook page. Above his picture was the caption, "meet YOUR cowboy"!
I got used to seeing him there when i logged on-named him Sam, started saying hello to him every morning and possibly had little one-sided conversations with him late at night every once in a while.
Now, I never once thought about what Sam was an ad for and one night when I was a little tipsy and clicked on Sam, i was shocked that he was an ad for a dating service! NO LIE. For a smart girl, I have these tiny little "no clue" blind spots and sam was one of them...mainly cause i couldn't figure out what cowboys had to do with a dating site. I love cowboys, by the way but that is a whole different blog! I gaped at the ad, read "meet your mature and meaningful match" and immediately CLICKED off the site! And clicked back on it...and back off and back on and signed up for the free month...sigh. The reason I was on it for three months is because I kept thinking they had forgotten to cancel my free membership. I kept waiting to be shut down but figured I would keep looking at all my flirts and e-mails until it happened. OHHHHHH-no they didn't forget..i did not realize my membership was renewing itself with the help of my debit card every month. I appreciate the good friend who patiently explained that to me and even smiled at me while he cancelled my membership and dismantled my profile. Pretty sure he waited to roll his eyes until he left-I LOVE friends like that!!!!
I decided I should have a frank and meaningful discussion with Spawn about my decision to join.
Me: Hey, I've decided to join a dating service...it's free for a month. Should be good for pure entertainment value. Who knows I might meet the love of my life, my prince... my..
Spawn: As long as it's free, funny and you never go on a date as long as you live and i get to look at the guys with you, I'm cool with it.
Me: Cool.
So Spawn and I embarked on our dating site experience. We never searched for our match, we simply responded or ignored whatever ended up in our in box. We made a pact never to laugh at how people looked, only at how stupid their user names were or how stupid their e-mails were. We would sit down and first delete the flirts. These are the lazy or inarticulate man's way to communicate. i like you so i will send you a smiley face with it's tongue hanging out that says i like you! uhh-yeah..no!
Next we would read the e-mails from people who actually wrote down WORDS and sent them. unless they had a user name like 1heart4u or 4urightnow TRUluv4U or our personal favorite, emotionaldave-these we just felt we had to delete based on...well surely you understand.
Then if they didn't have a fluffy romantic-stupid user name and they wrote words we read it-gave it a thumbs up or down on content AND if we gave it a thumbs up we opened their profile. Here the process often came to a screeching halt. If they were...hummmm..physically...not our type we simply, gave each other a look and a nod and deleted. If they were, oh i don't know 68 years old-we scoffed,"cannot follow directions!" and deleted.
If they were our type, in the right age and height category and they didn't live in phucking ARIZONA or some out of state place we might reply. These, way the hell out of state, profiles always said , don't mind traveling for the right person...pleeze! me neither as long it doesn't take me more than two hours!
Spawn always liked a profile that had a nice car or boat in it..and men will post pictures of their cars and boats...lol..sorry still tickles me AND pictures of their dogs..little fluffy dogs! :)
Anyway, Spawn and I have moved on to other things..I've decided dating is too complicated for me right now, Spawn got a ps3....but we did decide that you men who are 5'8" to 5'11" RULE the world, dudes..cause your are the majority! I didn't find my cowboy..but i had quite a ride! ;)