Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Spawn can't jump-my fault..probably

So..Friday at lunch I overheard a table of women talking about their uber-gifted athletic kids.  I found it more interesting than gossip talk.  Not scandalous.....more FASCINATING!   I work..I go home..I cook, clean ,do laundry, bully and cajole my child to finish homework, to pick up stinky socks, to shut up, to go to bed..it seems endless to me.  These women have children that require...based on what I heard an additional...40 hours a week to get them practices, games, fundraisers,off school season travelling teams....etc!  WOW!  These moms are BUSY!
 I walked out of that restaurant with my head head held high and thanked all the powers of the universe for giving me a non-athletic child!  If you don't think I don't appreciate after I have worked all day, done my mommy duty at home-that I get to read a book or play gin on the computer and listen to Spawn from the playroom playing MW3 saying things like "Right kid right kid..you are a moron!"  or "Yeah -your Momma!" you would be wrong! I got a bright, witty,funny and very smart child!
 It does not bother me one phucking bit that I do not have to sit in some stadium/arena/field watching my child play a sport!  Spawn tried every sport before he got to middle school...excelled at none and liked none.  Baseball..too fascinated by the bugs in the lights in the very, very far backfield position they put him in. Done!  Basketball...too short..too skinny..heart not in it..done. Little league football-put on the equipment..fell over backwards..one season..done.  Soccer..oh my god..done.  But he tried everything and I am proud of him for that. AND if he had found a sport that he loved, I would have done whatever I needed to to support that and I would also have been proud of him.
I kind of think Spawn was doomed sportswise because of me....may I say..the Lovin's are known for many things...none are athletic! :)
I was and am a tall,skinny, totally and completely SPASTIC, uncoordinated, and graceless child,teen and adult!  I was always last picked in every PE class because I SUCKED.  And I can see clearly now that I have always had a fear of BALLS! ( not yours,gentlemen,they scare me not!) I mean real balls (lol) the kind that are thrown,kicked, hit, hurled...the kind that can hit you in the arm,head,stomach or back!  I spent so much time cringing from possible ball impact...I never really learned to play a single sport.  I played every sport like it was "hot potato" until they no longer made me play.  I thought maybe I could support sports by being a cheerleader for about half a minute.  I had a neighbor who tried for two days to teach me cheer lead and finally just said "Wow, I just don't think this is the right thing for you...maybe band!  But not as a flag girl..no ..not with anything long and that you may have to control."
Spawn's father on the other hand is and always has been athletic.  Excelled at all sports in school..has coached all his teaching career and there are so many children that are the excellent athletes they are today because of his expertise and coaching.
Sorry about that, Spawn's dad...he Lovin "we can't play and we can't dance(although we think we can)" gene won out!
Mothers of all those talented athletes-I salute you!  I share in your enthusiasm and your pride from the couch.  I remain thankful that my little white boy can't jump  but has a mind and a mouth that keeps me engaged!  Go TEAM!

1 comment:

  1. you would be the perfect soccer mom...... natty lite.. check! cig... check! lol okay you ARE blessed!

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