check marks,smiley faces and a GOOD mental age

S-"MOM!!!!!"
M-"WHAT!!!!"
S-"What is this?!"
M-"What?!"
S-"These check marks with smiley faces on the calendar?????!!!"
M-"Booty calls."
S-"MOM!"
M-"OK i have started marking off the days until you graduate and move away." ;)
S-"MOM, are you pregnant!!!!!!?????"
M-"WHAT!"
S-"Because that would be DIS-gusting!"
M-"AND I am pretty sure IM-possible..just sayin!"
S-"Are these date nights...sexting nights??? What do these mean???"
M-"Son, those are nights/days that i ran-walked/ran-ran/walked."
S-"oh"
M-"What is the deal?"
S-" I have decided that except for the fact that you work all the time and you know, pay the bills and buy groceries and keep the house clean and mow and stuff like that, your mental age is SIX! And that needs to change!"
M-"I have decided your mental age is SIX! Want to have cookie time and watch South Park?"
S-STARE
M-STARE
S-"Ok but please stop feeling the need to tell me at every commercial, 'YOU REALIZE THIS IS SATIRE'. I get it,Mom."
M-"Ok but my mental age is really more like 15 with a WHOLE lot more maturity than I had at 15."
S-"MOM-you are 50, at the very least your mental age needs to be 40!"
M-"What if my mental age at 40 was 15?"
S-"I can't talk to you! My mental age is 23."
M-"DREAM on, baby boy. Although since most 23 year old men have a mental age of 14 and you are 14-you can probably stay in a holding pattern for the next 8 years. But don't baby, try to grow! Cookie Time! and you realize that South Park..."
S-"MOM! Please stop talking!"