Spawn-tanous/ Mommy Chat
S-"MOM,MOM,MOM!!!!"
M-" JESUS! Where is the fire!!!! WHAT???"
S-"PLEASE TELL ME I AM CIRCUMCISED!!!!!!"
M-"You are circumcised!"
S-"NO-HAVE I BEEN CIRCUMCISED???"
M-"Yes, son. What is the deal?"
S-" ohhhhhh thank you mommy! This girl was on Comedy Central last night and she was talking about how funny/ ugly looking uncircumcised penises were and I just didn't want to go into my..my,,,"
M-"dating years?"
S-"YES, dating years...uh....handicapped!"
M-"Ok ONE-I don't think an uncircumcised man would consider himself "handicapped", TWO-not sure that ANY penis is ever described as un-ugly/pretty/beautiful/cute/majorly attractive/not funny looking and THREE, since your "dating" years are 16 years away-I think this is stress free issue for you!" :)
S-"Mom, i know you keep saying I can't date til I am 30 but we both know that is stupid!"
S-" Mom, what does auto-erotic asphyxiation mean??"
M-" Google David Carradine, grasshopper!"
S-"OK but do you know if pop rocks and coke make your stomach explode?"
M-"GOOGLE it!"
Okay, first of all, when I read that he didn't want to be "handicapped" and I read it as "uncapped". Holy smokes I just laughed til I almost peed on myself...and these days, that doesn't take much. And auto-erotic asphyxiation...really?!!! Oh, hell that's funny.
ReplyDeleteJackie B